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Growing up in conservative West Michigan, I watched lesbian and gay friends and family members struggle to be accepted and be treated equally. There are gains and losses in this fight every day, and it is vital for LGBT individuals and their straight allies to stand up and to pay attention.
Showing posts with label LGBT suicide. Show all posts
Showing posts with label LGBT suicide. Show all posts

10 May 2011

Making Colleges LGBTQ Safe Zones

I've been published... elsewhere! Grand Central Magazine has posted an alternate version of a blog I wrote earlier this month. I rewrote it to make it more college/Central Michigan University oriented. Check out this link to see it online, and here is the post in it's entirety:


People who know me well know that conversations with me frequently turn to LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) rights issues. Last week, I was having one of my ubiquitous passionate outbursts about the way ignorance and hate leads to violence for LGBT people, when the person I was talking to shrugged it off.
“I really don’t think it’s a big deal anymore,” they said. “I don’t care if people are gay, and I’ve never seen any discrimination.”
While we have come a long way in recent years, discrimination, harassment and even violence against LGBT individuals is still a problem in this country.Studies suggest that the challenges LGBT people face because of their sexual orientation can prevent them from reaching their full social and academic potential in college.

A study from 2010 surveyed about 100 institutions and 5,000 college students. The study finds that about 25% of lesbian, gay and bisexual students and faculty experienced harassment while at college. 43 percent of gay, lesbian and bisexual people hid their sexual orientation to avoid intimidation. 39 percent of transgender and gender nonconforming people experienced harassment, and 63 percent said hid their sexual orientation.
These statistics become more personal when considering the story of Tyler Clementi (pictured on right), a 19-year-old college student from Rutgers University. His roommate, Dharun Ravi (left), filmed Clementi in a romantic encounter with another man, then posted it on the Internet. Clementi jumped off the George Washington Bridge on Sept. 22, 2010, just days after the video was posted online. Ravi is now facing a 15-count indictment, including a hate crime, and could face 5 to 10 years in prison.
Perhaps bullying of this intensity and scope isn’t widespread at CMU. But that shouldn’t stop students, faculty and administration from working to make CMU a LGBT safe zone, which could prevent future tragic stories of harassment, suicide or bullying occurrences at CMU. More importantly, LGBT students could feel accepted, which would allow them more successful and happier lives. A safe zone doesn’t only mean a lack of violence, but also active acceptance.
CMU has made strides in the recent months and years. As an attendee of many of the Pride Week activities, I loved being in an atmosphere of acceptance for all kinds of people (read more about my experiences during Pride Week here). Also, there has been movement on the issue of gender-neutral housing on campus.


But what can college students do to help on an every day basis? Many don’t have time to join a student organization or lobby student government or administration for changes, much less take action on what’s going on in the United States in terms of LGBT rights However, there are many simple things any college student, or any person, can do. Here’s a guide on how to help make a college campus a safe zone for LGBT people.

There are some very simple things you can do:
(adapted from a recent blogpost of mine about how violence can lead to hate)
  • If your roommate or a classmate calls something ”gay” as an insult, tell them they’re being insensitive.
  • If a student says they don’t care if LGBT people do their “thing,” as long as they don’t do it in front of him/her, say something like, ”Man, those straight people too. I really wish they wouldn’t do their thing in front of me.”
  • If a friend says, “Hey, is that girl a lesbian?” Exclaim something like, ”I think that guy over there might be straight!” People make being LGBT abnormal, and they act like deviating from the heterosexual norm is something that should define a person’s entire identity. Really, it’s just one small part of a person, not their whole being.
  • If you hear LGBT-bashing, be an ally and a friend. There’s not much you can do to change a hateful person’s mind, but you can be aware of those around this person. Don’t be afraid to say you disagree with the speaker. You never know who is listening and hurting as a result of this ignorance.
  • If you are straight, recognize your heterosexual privilege. If you saw Tim Wise speak at CMU earlier this year, you know what I’m talking about.
  • If you are a lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender individual, reach out to people who might need your guidance.
  • If you need guidance yourself, there are roommates, friends, and allies all around you. Make sure you get what you need.
  • Participate in activities like the Day of Silence (or other activities like CMU’s “Queer Monologues,” or the Drag Show) to help raise awareness about this issue.
  • Be aware of LGBT groups in on campus (such as Spectrum). If you have time, attend meetings or events.


Most importantly, make yourself available to those who need it. You never know who might be listening. Advertise that you’re an ally in subtle ways (like those above), and you will be a safe place for LGBT people.  Together we can make the entire campus a safer place.
So speak up, speak out, don’t stand for intolerance and actively fight for the acceptance of all people.
Want more from The Equality Chronicle?
  • Read about the price of ignorance herehere, and here.
  • Read about where LGBT equality stands in the US and abroad herehere, and here.

03 April 2011

Coming Out and Suicide: Words Matter

Via my good friend, Jenny.

This courageous girl, senior Kayla Kearney from Maria Carillo High School, came out to her high school at an assembly honoring Martin Luther King Jr. this year. She takes on the issues of her coming out in an incredibly admirable, brave manner.

Please watch this video. When I started, I was in a hurry with many things to do. 30 seconds into the video I was hooked, and I watched it from beginning to end.


Among other things, she directly answers those who say her sexual orientation is a choice, and those who say she must not act on her feelings. In an especially impassioned section, she describes how she wants to fall in love, walk down the street holding someone's hand, hold them and tell them everything's alright, and eventually, she wants to get married. It just so happens that Kayla wants to be with a girl.


"I want to break the silence... I want to stand up here and talk about this because no one ever does."

The importance of speaking up and standing up for vulnerable teens is extremely apparent. There is a cost, and this cost has a face. Unfortunately, many faces.




    Lance Lundsten (March 2011)

    Age 18








      Adam Wood (March 2011)

      Age 19








      Age 13









        Age 19









        Age 15






        Age 14








        Age 17







          Age 13











          Age 18





            Age 15










            Age 13





            Age 15






              Age 15






                There are many more suicides that are not available for me to find on the internet. And there could be many more to come.

                The reason for this? It's simple: HATE. And hate often stems from ignorance.

                Watch this video of Liberty Counsel's Matt Barber, saying gay kids are inclined to commit suicide because they know being gay is immoral and unnatural.



                Kayla understood well the power of words when she came out to her school.  

                Words can hurt, but words can also help.

                I want to ask you all who are reading this to remember that power, and to promise to never be quiet again. You really can help save lives.